Call Me Irresponsible

I am a sucker for good vocals and soothing tunes, with hint of piano and guitar, with little drums and loud base. And I absolutely love Michael’s latest album. Oh, you see, me and him, we’re on a first-name basis =)

Right now I am chilling to the soothing sound of Bublé’s songs. Sometimes it’s hard to listen to his songs, especially in times like these. His songs are so, so romantic, and right now the last thing I need is to be reminded of times I’m missing. But I don’t know any songs which don’t remind me of my ex. But, again, it’s OK. ‘Cause I don’t want to forget her just like that. I want to let her slip slowly to the back of my mind. I want her to slowly walk away from the depths of my mind. And I want her to slowly disappear, not totally, but just enough.

His songs, sometimes slow, sometimes fast, are good to listen to when you’re alone in your room, wanting to relax and hide away from the world. And it’s good, ’cause everybody needs time for himself. But right now, at this moment, his songs are hurting. Not in a bad way, but in a good way. Makes me realise how real this whole breaking up and moving on business. And trust me, I am surviving, living fully, and perhaps a little happier than I had always been.

Just a side note. Call Me Irresponsible is slated to be released on 1st May 2007. Go figure.

Untitled

The world is your professor, better get an A.

Things I learn, and found useful, I learn from the world around me. Not in school, not from my teachers, but from experiencing the world. I learn about law and order from stealing money, and got caught stealing money. That was years ago, when I was too young to know what is prison. But they say it’s OK to steal as long as you don’t get caught. I refuse to concur, the only thing I am stealing these days are hearts.

I learn about living from seeing people I love dying. I used to think death is something far away. Kindda like the Virginia Tech shooting, or the Columbine shooting. Sad, but they happened so far away, I can’t even relate. But when death strikes near to home, it hurts almost entirely. My grandma, my god sis, my close friend, my not so close friend. Now death is something I respect, as something inevitable, and I relate to death the way I relate to life.

I learn about love from falling in, falling out, and falling from love. My first ever sweet heart lasted 3 minutes. I remembered that I liked this gal for the longest time. She was sending mixed signals, and I was too young to even know what to do. And one day, as if God answered my prayers, she came to me and said she liked me as well, and I was like wow. It took me 3 minutes to get my bearings, and then I said one of the most idiotic lines ever uttered in the history of my entire life, “I like you a lot, but I think I need to concentrate on my studies. I’m sorry.” And in the span of 5 minutes, I had my first relationship, and probably broke the girl’s heart. She didn’t talk to me till now.

I learn about happiness from the sadness happening around me. It’s called a breakup because it’s broken. We need to feel sadness to know what is happiness. Life is like a wheel, one time you’re up there, the next you’re down here. And really, to be happy sometimes I need to feel a little sorrow. But seriously, I simply feel happy if I am able to put a smile on somebody’s face.

And in between I’ve learn many many more things. But the most valuable lesson I learn is about decency, integrity and dignity. And how I ought to be faking those. And this deserves a post of its own.

Happy weekend =)

Light Virgin Naphtha

My friend asked me yesterday if I’m moving on. Yes I am.
Then another asked how did I begin to move on. I just woke up one morning, and decided to move on.

One of the best things I like about my ex is her hugs. There were always times when I was feeling extremely down, and suicidal, almost. But she had ways to make me feel ok.

I remembered once when I was totally down and I felt that the world is closing on me. I went to look for her and I just sat there quietly. Her presence was enough to make me feel good, but she likes to ask questions. Sometimes I don’t know what to tell her. But after a while, she will just get so frustrated ’cause I’m not answering her. But then she’ll just come closer to me and give me the warmest hug. No words. No questions. Just a hug, a long warm hug. And that always melted my heart. And it seemed that everything is alright at that moment. That I can just stay there forever and forget all my troubles.

And that will be one of the moments that I’ll miss.

I wish I had that much effect on her, as she did on me.

p/s the title means nothing except that how crazy I am about work.